Bóbó's

I think it was about 8 years ago that Ireland experienced its first burger revolution. Inspired from afar by crazy mavericks having the wacky idea to put fresh ingredients on top of their ground beef there ensued a boom in high-end burger joints. For a people reared on chip shop burgers made out of floor sweepings this was a like an electric shock. Restaurants sprang up all over the place with alluring names like “Real Gourmet Burger”, “Gourmet Burger Company” and “Real Gourmet Burger Company”.

This meat sandwich fad managed to last quite a few years until like any boom, there was a bust, a burger bust. Dublin’s meat scene had had its Icarus moment and mass closures ensued. The reality was these places were offering was sub-standard food and it was actually the quickly evolving tastes and increasing sophistication of Irish customers that were cottoning on to that fact. What resulted was a kind of ground beef Darwinism where only the very strongest of diners endured and in some cases, multiplied.

So it was that after working at the Dickie Rock show I found myself falling into one of those survivors: Bóbó’s. Beside Whelan’s on Wexford Street Bóbó’s is a veritable institution. Opened during those halcyon days of early noughties burger hegemony it has prospered ever since. They recently opened a new outpost on Dame Street only 400 yards from their original incarnation, there must still be money in hamburgers somewhere.

In the pouring rain and still with the dulcet tones of Dickie in my ears I entered the doors of the new Dame Street branch with excitement, for some strange reason I’d never eaten a Bóbó’s burger before.  I’d always liked their image and branding because it seemed more organic and Irish (or Oirish in some sense) than the other generic gourmet places which, like some processed American cheese, seemed to melt into each other.

Upon entering the first thing I noticed is just how shabby the place is. It’s supposed to be a variation on a beat up dive bar but any sort of design nuance and subtlety has gone out the window. It’s far too subtle. Grubby tiled floors with rickety chairs and tables (and dirty toilets) don’t make for much of an eating experience and unfortunately this proved to be case with the whole meal. The owners obviously think that paying no money on your interior and having it look like your school canteen circa 1993 is what the kids want. No sir, it’s not. They should take note from some of Dublin’s other eateries operating within a similar genre that this look and ambiance is achievable if you know what you’re doing.

So many choices

Presented with the large laminated menu you are offered a choice of about 25 burgers. Why would one need to choose between 25 burgers? Each item on the menu is essentially a variation on the same burger, only differing with for example, the addition of mushrooms. The owners have also taken the time to give each of these original 25 an Irish themed name (“The Cashel” for blue cheese etc).

I decided on “The Cheese Burger” (good name) as I believe this is the only option when it comes to a burger. I hate the idea of loading something with pointless ingredients that detract from what you’re supposed to be tasting: the meat. I ordered it medium rare and waited all of about 3 minutes for it to arrive. Part of me thought that it was impossible for it to be ready so quickly, another part thought brilliant, it’ll have to be medium rare. It came medium well. The meat itself was dry and brittle, listless and sad. Little or no seasoning had been applied and the whole thing seemed depressed. One of the chefs flourishes had been to apply the miserly amount of cheese underneath the meat which I think confuses the texture when you’re taking a bite. That may sound pedantic but try it yourself.

The burger came with a smear of their own house relish under the beef, I don’t think they’ll be selling it in supermarkets anytime soon. It was like an overly acidic tomato jam which did nothing to complement anything. The salad and pickles (charging you €1 for pickles! a jar is 80c) seemed like they’d been sitting out for too long as they had a strange dry texture which only added to the melancholy surrounding this griddled meat patty. The only redeeming quality of this was the outstanding bun. Light and aerated, it easily compressed without losing stability. When I’m banging on about the buns being the best part of the dinner you know you’re in trouble.

You call that medium-rare?!

This came with what they describe as “proper skinny chips”. These were your usual straight out of the freezer bag fries with the addition of dried rosemary, I don’t know what “proper” is supposed to mean. All fine and not exactly objectionable but hardly saving proceedings.

Because of Bóbó’s enduring popularity and expansion I expected much more. Maybe my expectation was too high. If they made a few essential tweaks it could be adequate, this is burgers we’re talking about. While not bad value at €11, I’d consider Eddie Rockets to be superior. They would want to start thinking about upping their game as London has gone burger crazy over the past year and it’s only a matter of time before that hits here (see my MEAT Liquor post to observe one man losing his mind over grilled meat and cheese). All in all a pretty poor offering I’m afraid. The first burger revolution died, I don’t think the second one’s started yet

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